


Happier

by TwistedMashup



Category: Tales of Arcadia (Cartoons), Trollhunters
Genre: Angst, Death Threats, F/M, Heartbreak, I wasn't sure if I wanted to go ahead with my original idea, Minor Original Character(s), Mostly Strickler POV, Original Character(s), Original Characters for the sake of the plot, Stricklake - Freeform, Trying to let go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-07-01
Packaged: 2020-04-23 17:13:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19155445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwistedMashup/pseuds/TwistedMashup
Summary: In which Walter finds that Barbara finally found someone she deserves, and that wasn't him.





	Happier

**Author's Note:**

> Taking a quick break from my stories so I can feed you (and myself) with some Stricklake stuff, because this fandom needs (even) more of it.  
> I don’t usually write like this. I tried making it a one-shot but it didn't work out... So here's a few separate chapters.

It has almost been a year since the Eternal Night, and it has only been a few weeks after Barbara — with the help of Stricklander — had finally found families or adoption centers for the familiars.

Barbara had taken a leave for a few months after the events of the Eternal Night, but as the infants were being sent out faster than they had anticipated, especially how the trolls of Trollmarket decided to fix up the gyre before leaving — so that they can simply make a gyre station in New Jersey and connect it to the one in Arcadia for fast travel — which is really proving to be very useful. Walt visited the Lake residence about three times a day, everyday when they first started distributing the babies out. He would come and go on early mornings, noon, and evenings.

There were a few murder attempts from several changelings (or their minions) that came to Barbara, being as the Trollhunter’s mother — the Trollhunter who had freed Gunmar, Gunmar who freed the Pale Lady, creating chaos and forcing them to _save_ the familiar babies. Now, changelings have no master, but to say that they are free may not be the best word for it. Changelings cannot fit with humans anymore, not without their familiars, but it's not as if normal trolls would welcome them. Having that in mind, most — if not, all — changelings that survived Gunmar’s wrath, have a bone to pick with the Trollhunter. But since the Trollhunter had left under the protection of the trolls of Trollmarket and Merlin himself, the changelings are seeking revenge on the next best person — someone close to the Trollhunter — his mother.  
Stricklander, having set his oath to protect Barbara, did everything in his power to do so. He never told her about these ‘attempts’. There was already _too much_ in her mind and already _so much_ that was happening, he didn’t want her to worry. He watched her from the shadows and sewers during the day to ensure that she was safe… that’s what he told himself, at least… the other part of him just wanted to see her.

He never stayed in the Lake house too long, though it was somewhat not as bad as before, there was still a bit of unspoken tension between Barbara and Walter. As the months pass by, Barbara had to go back to work, leaving Walter for baby duty with the last few remaining ones.  
When all the babies are asleep, Stricklander would just sit there, wondering the what-could-have-beens between him and her. _What if I never lied? What if I helped Young Atlas from the very beginning? What if I never used her? What if-_. These are the thoughts that haunt him in the night, screaming his sins at his face, telling him how wrong he was… but the most painful question that he asks himself every single night, _Does she still love me?_ He thought, foolish of him to think that he deserves even her forgiveness — the forgiveness that she gave him the day Jim went to seek out the Staff of Avalon — more so, love? He shook his head and sighed.

One night, the few remaining babies were fast asleep. Stricklander simply laid his head against the headrest of the sofa, as the soft snoring of the infants in the crib filled the room. He was in his troll form — but it’s not like he still had a human guise to go with anymore — his horns was settled gently on the headrest and his wings were folded against the couch. His eyes that illuminated a green glow against the darkness, until he closed them.  
It was utterly quiet, until he heard a car park in front of the house. Because of his troll abilities, he could hear a faint conversation that came from outside the house, though he couldn’t make out what they said. He stood up to check on who it was. He walked towards the window and peaked. A man in the same work clothes as Barbara stood next to her, they talked and he saw her smile, a genuine smile that he hadn’t seen in so long. He was happy to see her happy, but a tiny piece of him felt this feeling that something was being taken from him.

Stricklander was never one to get attached to humans, it was always, _always_ just part of the job. He gave a little empathy, yes, but to say that he _cared_ was too much. He was a changeling and he couldn’t— _shouldn’t_ care, he told himself this every day for the centuries he had been around humans, this is how he got on top after all. No one ever gets on top by _caring_ , no one.  
But, there he was, standing by the window watching — as the very person who had pulled him out of the whole _never get attached to humans_ situation — be attached to someone else, someone new.

Friends, the man Barbara was with and her, they were friends. Stricklander repeated this in his head over and over again… until he leaned forward, grabbed her palm, and kissed the knuckles of her hand. The man did what _he_ used to do and she smiled softly, she smiled at the man the way she used to smile at _him_. There was a little ache that came after. Stricklander’s shoulders fell and it felt like his vision went dark and blurry. He watched as the man entered the parked car and left, Barbara walked up the porch and he stood there. He shook his head and blinked a few times as he heard the keys being grabbed from a pocket. He was caught in a panic, he quickly went to the door to the backyard. He heard the door open, he waited a few seconds and when there were no calls for his name, he flew away. He went back to the darkness where he came from, back to the darkness he belonged, where he had always belonged.

When he saw that man take her hand and kiss it, when he saw her smile at the man… it felt as if that’s where it ended. For him, that’s where it stops, where the driving force of a ticking clock stop.

When he saw that man, that was it, that was the end. But truly, it was just the beginning.

 

A few weeks pass by, the remaining familiars had been sent out… though, so were a few assassins and minions here and there. Stricklander had noticed that Barbara was not home as often as she tends to be, _perhaps some extra shifts? Or maybe she a lack of staff?_ he would think to himself as he wanders around the sewers of Arcadia. Arcadia’s sewers were not as bad of a dwelling as most people would think, it had little-to-nothing of the things he had grown used to, but it still worked. Stricklander had visited Barbara even after the familiars were sent out, but it felt awkward and somewhat unsettling, with the unspoken thoughts between them and the unexpressed feelings that just seemed to hover around; just wordless, voiceless feelings. At this point, Stricklander only watches her from the shadows, never to actually talk to her. He had done so much — too much — to ask for her hand again, the fear of rejection torments him, or worse, the fear of hurting her again. To know that he won't be able to hurt Barbara again was worth the pain. 

It was late noon, Stricklander was walking around the sewers looking for a few rats that ran around here and there. As he wandered, he heard a laugh, a _very_ familiar laugh that he could recognize from a mile away. “Barbara,” he whispered. He looked up to see a manhole that led to the streets. He stood quietly, blankly staring into the wall, listening for any cars that supposedly passed by. When Stricklander heard none, he lifted the manhole a bit, carefully. He peeked through the manhole with the cover slightly lifted, and there she was. There, in front of a restaurant, sat the woman in with her beautiful, fiery, red hair where one can feel her warmth by the touch of it… her ocean blue eyes where one can drown in just by looking at it. And there she was, with another man… he knew he never deserved her. Thee aching pain inside him wanted to say otherwise, but _he_ can’t.

He looked closer at Barbara and the man she was with. The man had a short, light brown hair that was combed on one side, he wore a white polo that was tucked in his brown pants. He looked like a gentleman — though Stricklander assumes that the man’s gentlemanly demeanor is not as great as his.

He watched the two closely. Stricklander had not seen Barbara this happy since _he_ made her happy. But the price to pay for deceit was pain.  
They stood up after a few minutes, said their goodbyes. Stricklander though that was it, but it wasn’t. The man leaned forward and kissed her gently on her lips. Stricklander felt something break inside, a heavy feeling, this… this was it, it was the end for him. He had to learn to let her go.

He crept back into the darkness he came from, not being able to bear this. He should be happy for her, it was selfish to think that she wouldn’t be able to find someone new — someone better.

He looked down at the tiny puddles of water that the sewer conveniently had. He saw his reflection, not the one he wanted to see… but it was him, and he couldn’t do anything about it. That was him, a monster, no one can ever love.

He heard a few clings and clangs of metal through some of the tunnels,  
“They’re back,” he whispered to himself.

He could have left then and there, in fact, he could have left when the Trollhunter and the rest of the trolls departed. But he chose to stay, for a debt he can never repay. He chose to stay for a love he can never deserve. For her.

Even if it means to be broken in the darkness, he chose to stay.

**Author's Note:**

> Im... sorry?


End file.
